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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I wasn't sure where to post this because it is about my dog but its also about my soon to be brother in law.

So anyway....
My soon to be brother in law is an alcoholic. He recently came to live with his mother again which is where SU and I live. He is 29 yrs old and his gf kicked him out of her house because of his drinking (which is partially b/c of her but I don't wanna go there).

SU and I have stressed to him "please don't let Bandit out of his kennel when no one is home" we don't want him to let him outside and then pass out drunk in the house like he usually does. (he stays home all day and has no job) He swears he doesn't let him out, but yesterday I came home and Bandit was in his kennel but his left side was covered in what I thought was mud but when I let him out I realized it was poop! I was the first one home all day besides Chris(BIL). So I asked him "did you let Bandit outside today?" He said no. So I was like then how did he get poop on himself? He didn't answer.

I told SU when he got home about 20 mins after me. We were going upstairs to give him a bath and Bandit stopped at the bottom of the stairs and just looked at me. I said come on bud bath time, he just stood there. So I went to grab his collar to give him a little tug up the stairs and as soon as I moved my hand toward him he backed away and cowered a little.

I got down on the floor and he came to me but very slow. The first thing that went through my head was Chris let him outside and then yelled and/or hit him because he rolled in poop.

I am still very mad and I dint know for sure if he did that or not, but I don't know why else Bandit would have acted like that. Neither SU, me or his mom have ever hit Bandit before, unless it was a tap on the nose when he was younger to say "no bite."

SU wants to set up a video camera to see what he does all day.

I just don't understand why people drink. I know he has some medical problems, and he is probably depressed, but no Dr. will diagnose him because he is an alcoholic. He has been to rehab several times and a week after he gets out he is drinking again. He was supposed to go to jail for 2 yrs. because he has 4 DWI's and has violated his probation twice. He went to court last week and the cop did not show. So they rescheduled for 2 weeks later.

And to top things off he has a car with no tags and no insurance and he drivers around drunk. Last night he drove through the front yard (drunk) b/c his car was blocked in the driveway and he needed to go to the liquor store. I'm amazed he is still alive or that he hasn't killed someone else. I know that sounds bad but he drives around drunk and he drinks 1 1/2 to 2 bottles of grain alcohol daily. Last time he went to rehab they measured his blood alcohol level and they said a drunk person with levels of about 80 would not be able to function and could have possible alcohol poisoning. Chris' levels were 400 and he was walking and talking just fine.

*sigh* I don't know what to do, his mom has pretty much given up and I don't blame her.
well thanks for listening, any advice would be great or if anyone has a similar problem I would like to know that we are not the only ones.
 

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I wouldn't set up a video camera, just because you can only see it later.

I would get a padlock and lock the crate closed. I would also lock the room in which the dog is in. It'd be really horrible if he harassed Bandit while in the crate because he can't let him out.

Are there any friends that you can leave Bandit at their house (crated) during the day? Can you afford doggy day care?

The padlock scares me some because what if the house caught on fire? No one but you or your SU could get Bandit out. But, it's also scary to think of what he's doing to your dog when he's not home.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
LarrytheLabs Mom said:
I wouldn't set up a video camera, just because you can only see it later.

I would get a padlock and lock the crate closed. I would also lock the room in which the dog is in. It'd be really horrible if he harassed Bandit while in the crate because he can't let him out.

Are there any friends that you can leave Bandit at their house (crated) during the day? Can you afford doggy day care?

The padlock scares me some because what if the house caught on fire? No one but you or your SU could get Bandit out. But, it's also scary to think of what he's doing to your dog when he's not home.
I wish I could afford day care but not right now
Melissa said:
I would move.
we are working on that.
 

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Since you are working on moving, I would make that your #1 financial priority (if it isn't already). Then I would agree with the suggestion to lock Bandits crate and the room he is in. His safety is the most important thing here.

Regarding your scumball BIL, the next time he leaves the house driving a tagless vehicle I would call the local police and give them a full description of him and the vehicle, especially if he is drunk. There is no excuse for that and he has shown he has no regard for his own safety, let alone anyone elses. Your MIL should not have let him move back home in the first place.
 

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Just wanted to say I'm really sorry you're having to go through this. Any chance of getting your BIL kicked out of the house?
 

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Jeep274 said:
Regarding your scumball BIL, the next time he leaves the house driving a tagless vehicle I would call the local police and give them a full description of him and the vehicle, especially if he is drunk.
He really is a danger to the general public. Hopefully the cop will show at the next court date.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Ok this is how screwed up the cops are around here....
BIL hit his father and we called the cops, they would not arrest him bc there was no restraining order but the thing is you can't file a restraining order on someone who has the same address as you, or so they say. We have called the cops on him for driving drunk before but nothing ever happened. The only reason his mom let him come back home is bc "its her baby and she couldn't let him be homeless and freeze to death". He also told her he would quit drinking.
 

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Sorry your haveing to deal with him I would just try like heck to get out of there and in the mean time try to lock Bandit in a room he can't get into during the day.
I'd be calling the Cops evrey time he's out drinking and driving too.
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Re: Need to vent..... also need some advice (long) Updtae

Good news!
SU just called me and said that his mom woke up and packed up all of BIL's clothes put them in her car and took him to the hopital (detox center) and said "dont come home I dont want you there anymore"! I'm really proud of her bc normally she lets him walk all over her. I guess talking about it really worked. Thanks guys.
 

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Re: Need to vent..... also need some advice (long) Updtae

BrownDog20 said:
Good news!
SU just called me and said that his mom woke up and packed up all of BIL's clothes put them in her car and took him to the hopital (detox center) and said "dont come home I dont want you there anymore"! I'm really proud of her bc normally she lets him walk all over her. I guess talking about it really worked. Thanks guys.
That is great news! Please make sure you thank her and support her. She will no doubt be feeling bad about it and will need to know she did the right thing. Let her know you guys are proud of her.
 

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That is very good news! It must have been tough for your MIL, but from the sounds of it your BIL is a danger to himself and anyone in his path.
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
I definetly will support her on that considering I've been telling her that is what she should do every time she says I dont know what to do. Im am so happy she decided to do that. The only thing is his dad has done this before and chris called the cops from the hopital and told them he needed a ride home and they brought him home.
 

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BrownDog20 said:
...The only thing is his dad has done this before and chris called the cops from the hopital and told them he needed a ride home and they brought him home.
Wow, you do have an interesting police force. All the officers I know would laugh at a call like that and say they aren't a taxi service. No matter, you guys should consider having the locks changed so that even if he decides to come back, he can't get in. It is not his house and would then be trespassing or even breaking and entering. Neither of which would be very good for him in court.
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
Jeep274 said:
BrownDog20 said:
...The only thing is his dad has done this before and chris called the cops from the hopital and told them he needed a ride home and they brought him home.
Wow, you do have an interesting police force. All the officers I know would laugh at a call like that and say they aren't a taxi service. No matter, you guys should consider having the locks changed so that even if he decides to come back, he can't get in. It is not his house and would then be trespassing or even breaking and entering. Neither of which would be very good for him in court.
Did that! and we called the police to ask them what would happen if he broke in and they said it is not breaking and entering because that address is on his license. and it is not tresspassing #1 bc he lives there and #2 we dont have a sign. I know its rediculous, its like they have an excuse for everything. I dont get it.
 

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Ok, I don't know the in's and out's of the legal system, but if you are evicted from a rental property and you try to break back in you will be arrested. Even though your license would still have that address on it. Perhaps your MIL could write a letter stating that he no longer lives there and was more or less evicted, sign it and have it notorized. Then file a copy with the police department and local DA.

Ah, there you go. Maybe try calling the District Attorney and run all of this by him. He would know the laws better than the police and hopefully give you some advice. Just throwing ideas at you.
 

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Jeep274 said:
Since you are working on moving, I would make that your #1 financial priority (if it isn't already). Then I would agree with the suggestion to lock Bandits crate and the room he is in. His safety is the most important thing here.

Regarding your scumball BIL, the next time he leaves the house driving a tagless vehicle I would call the local police and give them a full description of him and the vehicle, especially if he is drunk. There is no excuse for that and he has shown he has no regard for his own safety, let alone anyone elses. Your MIL should not have let him move back home in the first place.
DITTO! Protect Bandit form the jerk, then call the police and report him next time he is driving. Have him locked up and put away where he belongs before he kills someone.
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
Jeep274 said:
Ok, I don't know the in's and out's of the legal system, but if you are evicted from a rental property and you try to break back in you will be arrested. Even though your license would still have that address on it. Perhaps your MIL could write a letter stating that he no longer lives there and was more or less evicted, sign it and have it notorized. Then file a copy with the police department and local DA.

Ah, there you go. Maybe try calling the District Attorney and run all of this by him. He would know the laws better than the police and hopefully give you some advice. Just throwing ideas at you.
Good idea! I will find out who to call. Thanks.
 
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