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I need opinions I'm not one to usually ask this, but this is driving me crazy. I went out with an old friend. We have been friends since we were 14. I hung out with him in High School. When i was in the Air Force we always got together for dinner, or did something together no matter who we were dating. I lost touch with him for 4-5 years. Partly because I had heard through his mom he was engaged. I did not want to rock the boat and left it alone. Fast forward to the present. I saw him on facebook. He never got married the relationship ended. He joked you should have called me sooner it would have saved me a few years. We went out had a great time, he kissed me, which shocked me but i like the idea. He also joked why have we not done this sooner we could have been doing this for years. Then for about 2 weeks after we exchanged txt messages. I told him to call me he did immediately. He works in finance and his world is stressful right now. It was made worse by the SEC entering his job to do an audit. He said he is wondering if the job was even worth it and that he would call me in a few days. I have not heard from in 2 weeks. If this was another guy I would say jerk and move on. He has never done this before why would he do it now? Should i try to call him again and tell him if he's stressed Im here to listen. If he has decided to avoid me because he does not want a relationship tell me that too. We have been friends a long time no harm no foul. Then i was thinking maybe an e-mail would be better as to not ut him on the spot. Or option # 3 just leave it alone. Ok any advise here would be great even if its to tell me to worry about something else!
 

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Should i try to call him again and tell him if he's stressed Im here to listen. If he has decided to avoid me because he does not want a relationship tell me that too. We have been friends a long time no harm no foul.
I'd recommend this -- along with listening to the tone of his voice and attitude. You could do the e-mail but then you give up getting so much more information.


 

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Funny thing about his Facebook is he made pretty regular posts/updates. Enter the SEC he stopped. I mean daily like "headed to the gym" "wish the office heat would work" Going here for the weekend. This guys show up and he falls off the map. Thats another reason Im hedgeing to call him, it may be as simple as he is stressed, but come on to answer a txt message is 5 seconds out of your life.
 

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What's SEC?

You said you texted eachother often. I would text him and just say "everthing OK?". He did kiss you after all, so he brought it to a higher level than just friends.

Now you have to keep us posted! :)
 

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I'd call and leave a message saying that you're concerned about him and want to be sure he's alright. Then the ball is in his court. He either calls and talks about what's going on, or he doesn't, in which case he's a jerk who doesn't care if a person who cares about him is worried. Either way, you've got an answer.

I understand the stressed out thing, but if he's the kind of guy who pulls back everytime work gets stressful, then you need to consider if that's the kind of thing you're willing to put up with on a longterm basis. That could get pretty old if you have to spend all your time guessing what's going on in his head.
 

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I'd call and leave a message saying that you're concerned about him and want to be sure he's alright. Then the ball is in his court. He either calls and talks about what's going on, or he doesn't, in which case he's a jerk who doesn't care if a person who cares about him is worried. Either way, you've got an answer.

I understand the stressed out thing, but if he's the kind of guy who pulls back everytime work gets stressful, then you need to consider if that's the kind of thing you're willing to put up with on a longterm basis. That could get pretty old if you have to spend all your time guessing what's going on in his head.
Very well said. Call, leave the message, and then it's his turn. Who knows, maybe he's in jail! (just kidding!!)
 

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If you're worried and/or want to pursue this...give him a call. When my husband is stressed at work he tends to fall off the planet for a bit...no FB, no calls to friends...becomes a hermit so he can relax during whatever down time he can find. You don't want another 4 -5 years to go by just because you didn't call do you?
 

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I would txt and tell him you haven't heard from him in awhile and just wondered how work was going, etc. Or just call, if you'd prefer to be more direct.
 

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So...what happened? :)
 

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I'd call and leave a message saying that you're concerned about him and want to be sure he's alright. Then the ball is in his court. He either calls and talks about what's going on, or he doesn't, in which case he's a jerk who doesn't care if a person who cares about him is worried. Either way, you've got an answer.

I understand the stressed out thing, but if he's the kind of guy who pulls back everytime work gets stressful, then you need to consider if that's the kind of thing you're willing to put up with on a longterm basis. That could get pretty old if you have to spend all your time guessing what's going on in his head.
I like this one. If things don't go the away you want I hope it doesn't kill your friendship. That would be sad. Keep us posted.
 
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