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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
As some of you might remember last May my youngest son was the driver in a tragic accident that killed one of his friends. He had counseling and seemed to be putting his life back together. As the date of the accident gets closer he is unraveling.

I woke up last night and I could hear him in the kitchen. I got up and he was sitting at the kitchen table tears streaming down his face. He said, "Oh Mom I'm dreaming again. I know it was an accident, but the pictures just won't go away." We sat and talked for awhile and he said he felt better. It pains me to see him relive it all over again.

He has a wonderful girlfriend and a large group of friends that are a great comfort to him. I just hope it's enough to get him through the next month and a half.

I know with the tone of the board these days I'm taking my life in my hands with this post but hubby is away this weekend and I had to get it off my chest.
 

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All I can do is send lots of hugs and prayers to you and your son! Hope he continues to fight the dispare and makes it through.
Terri
 
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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I am so sorry that he is going through all this pain - but would think that it would be "normal" for him to feel this way around the first anniversary. He went through a very traumatic and devastating event - it has to be difficult for him to reconcile it all in his mind. He would really benefit from being able to talk to a counselor again - talking about the emotions will help get them out.

We'll keep you all in our thoughts and prayers.
 

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Oh Chris,
I am so sorry he is feeling so much pain as the anniversary of the accident gets nearer.
I will keep your son and your family in my thoughts. (((HUGS)))

I am glad you go the weight off your chest and vented. We are all here for you.

Molly
 

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Chris

I am so sorry. But it is normal for him to feel this way and I think you did all you can do which is to love him and be there for him. My best friend was killed by a drunk driver in HS and I felt so guilty because I should have been with her but I thought my horse was sick and stayed home. I kept thinking if she had had to come pick me up she would have been a few minutes later so she wouldn't have been killed. I now know better and realise we both could have been killed but....The first anniversary was the worst. But 30 years later I still remember them.

If he gets really bad he might need a little more therapy. Give him a hug for me and tell him I understand how he feels. And please always feel free to come here when you need a friend we will be here for you.
 

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I'm so sorry for your son. He and the rest of your family will be in my prayers.
 

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You've definitely got a place to express what you're feeling- and my prayers.

Laura
 

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Oh man. :'( This is just so, so sad. :'(

Chris, I would think that his reaction to the upcoming anniversary is totally and completely normal. Gosh, I just feel so bad for your son. Bad anniversaries, just like good anniversaries, tend not to be forgotten. :( You know, if it would make you feel any better, you can probably contact his therapist or your family doctor and tell them what is going on. Maybe they can give you more insight on what is going on, and what to expect to see as your dear son goes through these awful stages of grieving.

Most important, and you have already done this, is the fact that you were there for him when he needed you last night. You clearly have a wonderful relationship with him. He trusts you with his emotions/feelings.

My heart is breaking for you and your son right now. I will surely keep you in my thoughts and prayers. We will be here, when you need to talk more about this.

((hugs))
 

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sending hugs, good thoughts, and prayers your way! I'm sorry for what you are all going through.
 

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I am so sorry your son is going through all of this. I agree with the others that as bad as it is it is a normal reaction. I will keep him and you in my prayers. You certainly should feel you can share with us, as a mother, I can only imagine what you are going through seeing your son suffer like this. God bless all of you.
 

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(((HUGS)))))
I know you wish you could take away all of his pain. It is horrible as a Mom to watch your child suffer. I agree that the first anniversary is going to be tough and that is completely normal. Even though he went through counseling his reaction now is because you raised a kind, conscientious son. If this passed by with no reaction it would also be troubling. I think seeing his counselor again is in order. Don't wait for it to get worse, there's no reason to. Good luck and God Bless. I'll keep you all in my prayers.
 

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Anniversarys can be painful. I'd say it is fairly typical for him to feel this way around the first anniversary. It is good that he has a strong support group. I hope he can lean on them and you to help him through this. My thoughts are with him.
 

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Lots of hugs to you and your son.
 

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I'm so sorry. I don't have anything to add to the excellent advice others have posted, but I'm sending good thoughts to you and your son. (((hugs)))
 

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I do not have any advice.

But I wanted to let you know you and your son will be in my thoughts.
 
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