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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
So yesterday though the snow was knee high and it was brrrrrrr cold out I figured I would walk with my nephews to the YMCA and we could go swiming or something. Now this is pretty much my fault because usually I make sure no one can see these but yesterday I honestly forgot. But my back, shoulders, sides, stomach, legs, and arms all have scarring to some degree. My arms and legs are the ones im least sensitive to people seeing and are lighter because they get more exposer to natural light. Now my other scars on my body are bigger darker and I guess probley disturbing to those who airn't used to it. I usually don't go swimming without a tshirt but I knew the Y wouldn't be packed so I didn't bother. Now both the boys have seen my arms and legs and like I said they are so light im not even sure they know what they are. Really my legs are worse than my arms anyways. But obviousely neither have really had much of a chance to see the worse of it.

So yesterday we had gotten in the pool and were swiming when the youngest broke away from the other kids he was playing with and grabbed my hand. He's really not the cuddly one out of the two and its very very rare that he holds my hand or hugs me. But anyways he looks up and me and goes "Aunt Sammy were you attacked by a bear?". Honestly I didn't know what he was referring to at first and just kinda laughed and asked why? And then his tiny hand eaches out and touches my left side where there is a large dark scarr down the the length of my side. So he looks there and says "Did a bear bite you here Sammy?". I honestly wasent sure what to say and I probley handled this the wrong way. But he's six and I don't think he would have understood. So I just kinda knelt down in the water so we were face to face and said "No it wasent a bear it was more like a monster" to which I ended the statement by tickeling him madly and making his laugh until he coughed.

It broke my heart and made me feel so bad. I honestly wasent sure what to do or say. What could I say? Some of those scarrs were self inflicted cuts and burns honey but those big ones are from a mean man? I would have screwed him up majorly and I know my sister doesent want either one of the boys knowing too much about my "issues" as she calls them. God she will probley be mad about me telling him it was a monster. But its the best I could do in the moment.

I am really really sorry it seems like all my posts are just really heavy and deep lately. I don't mean to freak anyone out but its been on my mind all night and I needed to talk about it. So what do you all think did I handle it the right way for his age?
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
M.Slick said:
Woah, that's just.. Terrible.. Howd you get the scars again?
Well some are self inflicted. I have struggled with self mutilation since I was about 5 but didn't start in on myself with knives until I was 13. When I was younger I literally picked myself apart with my finger nails ect. But the major scars on my torso are from my one of my lovely ex's who enjoyed putting me through alot of mental and physical pain.

Once again sorry for the graphic stuff but its just part of me.
 

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SawyerAndMe990 said:
M.Slick said:
Woah, that's just.. Terrible.. Howd you get the scars again?
Well some are self inflicted. I have struggled with self mutilation since I was about 5 but didn't start in on myself with knives until I was 13. When I was younger I literally picked myself apart with my finger nails ect. But the major scars on my torso are from my one of my lovely ex's who enjoyed putting me through alot of mental and physical pain.

Once again sorry for the graphic stuff but its just part of me.
Sorry if this sounds mean but you need serious help. You can add me on msn if you need someone to talk to [email protected]
I suggest you talk to a doctor. He will help you.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
M.Slick said:
SawyerAndMe990 said:
M.Slick said:
Woah, that's just.. Terrible.. Howd you get the scars again?
Well some are self inflicted. I have struggled with self mutilation since I was about 5 but didn't start in on myself with knives until I was 13. When I was younger I literally picked myself apart with my finger nails ect. But the major scars on my torso are from my one of my lovely ex's who enjoyed putting me through alot of mental and physical pain.

Once again sorry for the graphic stuff but its just part of me.


Sorry if this sounds mean but you need serious help. You can add me on msn if you need someone to talk to [email protected]
I suggest you talk to a doctor. He will help you.
Hun I have the serious help. I got to group five days a week and a regular therapy session every other week. Im also on three different antidepressents and anxiety pills. October I had a major break down and was hospitalized and once I got out all the help started. I havent cut, cried, or had a break down since October 15th 08. Im actually so much better and really proud of myself. And no I didn't take it the wrong way I know your new as am I ;).
 

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SawyerAndMe990 said:
M.Slick said:
SawyerAndMe990 said:
M.Slick said:
Woah, that's just.. Terrible.. Howd you get the scars again?
Well some are self inflicted. I have struggled with self mutilation since I was about 5 but didn't start in on myself with knives until I was 13. When I was younger I literally picked myself apart with my finger nails ect. But the major scars on my torso are from my one of my lovely ex's who enjoyed putting me through alot of mental and physical pain.

Once again sorry for the graphic stuff but its just part of me.


Sorry if this sounds mean but you need serious help. You can add me on msn if you need someone to talk to [email protected]
I suggest you talk to a doctor. He will help you.
Hun I have the serious help. I got to group five days a week and a regular therapy session every other week. Im also on three different antidepressents and anxiety pills. October I had a major break down and was hospitalized and once I got out all the help started. I havent cut, cried, or had a break down since October 15th 08. Im actually so much better and really proud of myself. And no I didn't take it the wrong way I know your new as am I ;).
Well that's good. Thank god. I hope you never have a break down. And I hope you get better.
 

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No I don't think you handled it wrong. You made light of the situation. I would let your sister know so if he ask about "monsters" she knows. In a more private home setting she can explain the monsters were a bad person who hurt you but not someone he needs to worry about. She can also explain that when people are sick they sometimes hurt themselves but you are so much better now that you wouldn't do it now. A public pool is not a place to have an in depth discussion about the situation.

Good luck to you and I hope you continue on the path you are taking of getting and accepting help. I do volunteer work with abused women and sometimes I want to shake them for going back to their abuser. I am proud of you that you have had the strength to leave him behind and move on with your life.
 

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I think you handled it as well as you could at the time. However, you may have given him a fear of monsters. If it occurs again, try telling him you were in an accident because someone was careless.

God bless you and may you find peace and happiness!
 

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You handled it just right, for that particular moment. I'm so proud of you the way you lighted the situation and that you have been doing great since Oct 08.

He's young and it was a public place, it would of been to much for him to grasp. You may want to let your sister know about the "monster" so she is prepared if asked about it (just a thought). I don't think you sister should be mad, everyone has obstacles in their lives. Yours was just a little longer than others and she should understand the circumstance. keep up the great progress, and let us know how you are feeling from time to time.

Many (((HUGS))) to you.
 

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I'm sorry you've had so much pain in your life.. it must feel great to have gone so long without an episode .. that's a huge accomplishment and you /should/ be proud =)
 

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You *were* attacked by a monster. So your reply was completely honest and age-apprpriate. Kudos for quick thinking. When your nephews are old enough to understand, you can explain exactly what *kind* of monster.....

Prayers to you for continued strength on your ongoing trek toward wholeness......
 

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{{{Hugs for you Samantha}}}

You did the right thing. Little kids need simple explanations. There is no way that a 6 year old could understand what you have been through so a simple version is best. What he really needs to know is that you are OK.

Congrats to you for being able to put it out of your mind and enjoy time with the kids! That shows me that you are moving on.
 
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