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Just anouther random post lol.

All school before High School was utter hell. I live on a ranch my first 13 years on this planet. So of course I was always called a hillbilly and all that happy crap. I would say I was popular in the negative sense lol. Everyone knew who I was. And everyone loved to torture me. I was shy and quiet and socially awkward. We lived in the middle of nowhere so it wasent like I have neighborhood kids to play with. And my siblings are 7 and 11 years older than me. I also saw the world totally different from other kids in an artist view. Which made me a huge freak among the other girls who shopped at "Limited Too" and "Claires" lol. I choose to go to the Salvation Army cause I personally didn't like the clothes at the "trendy" stores. Its funny cause the way I have dressed for years is all of a sudden cool like it was when my parents were young lol. Anouther thing that made me an outcast was well I was always told by all the boys and girls that I was beyond ugly. I still to this day have no idea if im attractive or not. I lean more towards not and don't take compliments well.

High School was a bit better for me. Mainly because my parents got divorced and my mom and I moved to a different city where I was able to reinvent myself. I went from having no friends in my old town to having a huge group of friends. I wasent popular there though. I hung out with the "goth" kids though none of them classified themselves that. We all shared our artistic world though. I really had no idea there were other people like me out in the world. I was still though especially different and anyone outside of the group didn't really know how to take me. I was after all the girl who failed gym :whistle:. I walked the halls in a poncho and one black shoe and one red lol or other color combos. In my defense they were converse and so that makes it semi okay. My freshmen year mid year I dyed my hair bright bright green lol it took some time. Sophmore year I dyed my hair black and the underside purple. Different times in that year I added orange streaks and anouther time hot pink. Lol im surprised I still have hair honestly. But I wasent trying to be different and I wasent trying to stand out. I just would do things on a whim lol sometimes I regreted other times I didn't.

I have tamed down a bit now thats in been two years since I have been in any school enviroment. I still dye my hair often but its they tend to be more natural colors ;). Sometimes my shoes don't make or sometimes I forget shoes completely. Honestly don't beleive I was made to be average lol. No matter how hard I try it just doesent seem to happen lol.

So did any of you fit in better than me? What were your experiences?
 

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No which is prolly why I did drugs. Well part of the reason. Once I shattered my knee at 12, I couldn't do the one thing I was really good at which was sports. So I really didn't fit in, but the stoners liked me so I did fit in with them.
 

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Sometimes I did, sometimes I didn't. In Jr High especially. High School was fine though, university was awesome. I pretty much did my own thing, and sometimes that made me popular, sometimes it didn't. In Jr High I had a small circle of friends, so I almost always *fit* somewhere. I think the tougher times can make you stronger. You have to use that experience(s) to make you a better person. You can become more empathetic, sensitive, and aware from being the outcast. Conversely, you can become withdrawn, distrustful, and bitter.

I think the most important thing is to try to be true to yourself. You'll never be happy as a fraud. And know that no one has the right to give you ****, and if they do, handle it. Get the help you need , and don't stop trying until you get it.
 

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I was pretty popular all through school.. probably because i was funny. And yet, high school isn't something i'd ever want to revisit for any reason.. i can't imagine high school for those who didn't fit in.
 

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Discussion Starter #5
labby said:
No which is prolly why I did drugs. Well part of the reason. Once I shattered my knee at 12, I couldn't do the one thing I was really good at which was sports. So I really didn't fit in, but the stoners liked me so I did fit in with them.
Hey the stoners liked me too! I didn't smoke with them though. My lungs are so screwed up I probley would be dead by now if I had. Will always have a soft spot for them though :D.
 

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Well, sorta...and then no....

I moved around a lot as a kid and was in one school system from 6th grade til my jr. year of high school. It was a small town (there were 80 kids in my graduating class) so it took awhile to fit in. And just the perfect time - when EVERYONE is going through their awkward phase. High school was better - I lost some weight, ditched the glasses and thank god it was the 80s cuz everyone was wearing funky clothing. No sports for me, but that really didn't matter. There really weren't enough kids to have a popular crowd. Everyone hung out with everyone else. Sure there were the "autoshop" kids and the "AP" crowd, but other than that...pretty much everyone came to the big parties by the lake.

And then we moved. February of my jr. year. To a large town with a big school (over 300 in my graduating class here) filled with 100s of cliques that were mindboggling to discern. Wealthy town (I remember coming home on my first day "MOM! No one is wearing jeans!" )Fortunately (or unfortunately?) I fell in with an easy going crowd...that may have partied a little too much. :whistle: So I don't even know most of the kids I graduated with from there. I look at these names on Facebook and I have no idea who these people are.

And then I went to college and became a theater major and all my ideas of cliques and trendy attire went out the window and I learned how to be comfortable. We didn't have friends...we had family. And still do. I married one of them and count many of them to be my best friends...almost 17 years later. So while I have some really embarrassing memories of some really awkward times from high school...they don't matter now.
 

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Discussion Starter #7
eastcoastmom said:
Sometimes I did, sometimes I didn't. I pretty much did my own thing, and sometimes that made me popular, sometimes it didn't. I had a small circle of friends, so I almost always *fit* somewhere. I think the tougher times can make you stronger. You have to use that experience(s) to make you a better person. You can become more empathetic, sensitive, and aware from being the outcast. Conversely, you can become withdrawn, distrustful, and bitter.

I think the most important thing is to try to be true to yourself. You'll never be happy as a fraud. And know that no one has the right to give you ****, and if they do, handle it. Get the help you need , and don't stop trying until you get it.
Very true. There are times I wished I had fit in better with the general population. But then I think about it and realize I would be so bored. I do have the issues with being withdrawn and distrustful. Im still painfully shy and sometimes when I first meet people they usually get the impression I don't like them. But its just because im wracking my brain trying to figure them out...Which transitions to the distrustful thing. It takes a long time before I truly trust anouther person. And still to this day the only two people I trust to be completely honest and love me are my mom and best friend Lindsay. I hope someday to be able to trust more.
 

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I think the stoners are always the least judgmental group of people in high school. My brother had been one so I kind of got to hang out as well. I never smoked, I just leaned against somebody's car and looked bored with the rest of them.

You know when you see kids walking four or five across, how you know the two in the center are the heart of the group? I was always the kid on the end.
 

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Sports is probably what saved me from being a disaster.. i did pot and various other things throughout highschool, but i was very into sports so i wasn't stoned all the time.. plus there was that basic slow talking that a stoner gets i found annoying..

he was cool when you needed a gram, though =)
 

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Discussion Starter #11
Golfgirlrobin said:
You know when you see kids walking four or five across, how you know the two in the center are the heart of the group? I was always the kid on the end.
I was that kid too.
 

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There was only 22 people in my graduating class. There really wasn't a division of groups. It was a K-12 school, and I pretty much grew up with 95% of my class - from church preschool before Kingergarten, then K-12 with them. We were all pretty close, some more than others. I was really shy, but since I grew up with all of them, it only bothered me when I had to get up in front of the class. College is another story.... lol Talk about a shock even though it was only 15 minutes from home (and I lived at home until I got married).
 

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I was fine in high school. It was hard the first year because I was the new kid. My Mom moved us to Florida when I started high school. I always wondered how things would have been different. I make friends pretty easily so it wasn't too bad. I am still very close with a friend from high school. I went to all of the parties, prom, homecoming etc. I had a lot of fun but I sure wouldn't want to do it over again. High school was a fun experience for me.
 

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I was very, very, very, very, very, lucky in high school to have 6-7 really close friends. We looked out for each other through thick and thin, 24/7. Nothing was too much to ask, and we were there for each other in the blink of an eye.

And today, I'm in close contact with exactly 0 of them. We exchange Christmas cards annually, but that's about it.

Without them, I wonder if I'd've made it.
 

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I fit in with my friends, we were the country bumpkin kids, but not the popular crowd. I didn't care that much though. At least I think that now.

BTW, from your other thread about newspapers, buttons, etc. You are a beautiful girl. I know from your post you don't consider yourself attractive, but I disagree!
 

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Let's see...an obviously gay kid in the heart of the Bible belt. Didn't fit so well. Fortunately my music and drama teachers were able to help shield me from a lot of crap and make me feel a little better about myself.
 

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Eh. I had friends always, but I was definitely not popular. I went through a very definite ugly duckling phase that lasted a little too long to be called just a phase. Bad hair, bad skin, bad glasses, bad clothes and braces. Woo!

I eventually got contacts, lost the braces and everything else got better. I rarely went out though, on dates, to parties...
 

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I wasn't popular if that was what you mean, but I had a reasonably sized group of friends so was never a loner or anything like that. Our school had the "popular" kids, the geeks, the chavs (think redneck), the alternative people and the people that didn't really fit into either of those groups. I hung around with alternative people and was a bit of a rebel, but I think the fact that I was a very small kid who kept relatively quiet saved me from a fair amount of bullying. Although that in turn did also make me a target in my first few years, I was never alone in that...the "popular" kids picked on EVERYONE that in their eyes were not good enough. A friend of mine even had death threats.

So, basically the first few years were not great, the last two were fine. Never had a problem in college and now university. I couldn't get over what college was like when I first attended - I was shocked at the lack of bitching/nastiness/bullying. I'm sure it went on, but never to your face like they would in school.
 

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I wasn't in the popular preppy/jock crowd, but I did fine. I was in band and did well academically, so I was friends with all the band geeks and NHS kids. One of my best friends was in the "emo" crowd, so I was also friends with all the stoners. I got along with most everyone tho and had friends in all types of crowds - I don't think you could really pin me to one group of people. I liked high school just fine, but I can see how it could be a nightmare for those who didn't fit in. Thankfully college isn't nearly as clique-ish.
 
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