My mil is driving me crazy with her offhanded comments and I am so upset with her right now.
The comments are always in front of the kids when neither dh, nor , I are present. The day before yesterday, my 12y/o was so excited to tell Gramma about all the things we've taught Abbey i.e sit, stay, roll over, spin, shake and leave it.
My mil, apparently, shook her head and told my son, in a disapproving manner, it's silly to be teaching her all of these "tricks" when we should be house-training her. My poor guy, she's always knocking him off his happy box.
For the record, she has not said one positive thing about Abbey since we've gotten her, other than..."she's going to be a BIG dog"...repeatedly. Does she really think we don't know that?
So my question is...how long is the average for housebreaking?
Abbey will be 12wks on Sunday and she never has bms in the house but she still pees occasionally. When it comes to piddling, she doesn't really let us know she has to go out. I just clock watch and take her out when I think it's time. I do say "outside" and "pee" at the door, and while she's doing her business...hoping that I can "ask" her and get her to run to the door. I was thinking about getting some bells to put up and training her that way.
Any suggestions? Is my mil just being a grumpy old lady with nothing better to do than insult everything we do? (it used to be just the kids, now it includes our pup)
Your MIL sounds like an annoying old biddy!
Anyway, when you take Abbey out is she on her leash? When you take her out do you stay with her until she's done and then praise to the high heavens everytime she goes where she is supposed to? When you take her out do you say the same thing each time you want her to do her thing? (eg: we take Milly out and tell her "do Wee's" hehe)
If you say yes to all the above and take her out after dinner time, play time and when she wakes and are consistent then you are doing all the right things.
We are at a point where Milly will go to the back door and wait for us to let her out, so we have put a bell on the back door and are teaching her to use that to notify us that she is at the back door. That is working for us also.
I think you're doing GREAT with Abbbey and i would tell your son to ignore her!!
You have been such an awesome help Sarah! (I hope that is your name!) :-*
Yes, Abbey is ALWAYS on leash outside (same 6ft sq area). I'll ask her to "pee" and when she starts, I repeat the word over and over until she's finished. Same thing with #2. And I praise like a crazy women!
In the beginning, I was under the impression that housebreaking only took a couple of weeks (especially for labs). Mil makes it sound like it should only take a few days...why else would she say what she did? When a dog is "housebroken" does that mean no accidents as well as consistently letting people know that they have to "go?"
I'm just not sure how long it REALLY takes...10 days, 5 months?
The set-up of our house makes it a little more difficult for Abbey to let people know she needs to go out. We have her gated in the kitchen/dining room and the door is down a flight of 6 steps (which she does not climb). So she'll stand at the top of the stairs for many reasons...to steal hats, mittens etc ;D She also stands there contemplating whether she should TRY the stairs (then we'd need ANOTHER gate!).
I do want to try the bell thing, I think it would be beneficial for us. At this time, she only goes out to do her business and then back in....until her shots are completed. I don't think she'd manipulate the use of them to go outside and play.
And thank-you! We try hard with Abbey, we want to do right by her. It hurts to hear what mil said, we're trying to do the best we know how. 99% of what I have learned is from this board, even though I'm not a big poster.
I guess the most important thing to really remember is that a puppy can't really hold it in until they are 10 months old so if the housebreaking isn't working it's because you aren't being consistent. I think the bell would be a great way for Abbey to communicate with you, and when your MIL is over and Abbey rings the bell to go outside then that should shut her up hey?
She's fine. The 10 months old thing is hogwash. A pup can sleep through the night and not have accidents in no time flat if you are diligent.
But since you have a busy household and really need to supervise her. When she stops one thing or loses interest, you need to take her out. After a meal, take her out, after playing take her out. Just like people, during the times when they are up and awake and active, they have to go much more frequently. You never let her out of your site at this time even for a minute. If you can't supervise, in the crate she goes. She's not piddling because she doesn't know...she's piddling because she's GOT TO GO.
More consistency and you'll have it down.
And, I'm not sure what the MIL has to do with your dog not being housebroke.
Dani, Rider & Rookie
SHR Watson's Safari Rider, JH, WC, CL1-R, RA, CGC, TDI
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Thanks!Originally Posted by Dani
I feel we are very consistent. We take her out during all the times you have mentioned. So only once every few days will she have a piddling accident (these ones tend to be frustrating cause 9/10 it's about 10min after she's been outside and peed already). And she is always 100% supervised or in the crate.
The mil has NOTHING to do with her not being housebroken. It was her comment that got me thinking about it. I thought Abbey was doing well. In the same breath I feel like I'M the one trained, not the dog. I really wasn't sure if there was something more that I should be doing to hasten the process.
I still don't understand the "housebreak in 7 days" concept. That's where I'm getting confused. Abbey can hold it all night and has since she was 7wks 3days (10hrs). But when will SHE start letting me know she has to go. Like I said, we are very diligent and consistent but it's all about ME clock watching and taking her out after activities and eating/drinking. I guess that's where the bell concept comes in.
Regardless, my mil can be a pita and it was nice to be able to vent. She's got a big heart, but also a big mouth. Pessimistic would be the polite way to describe her.
Alfie is 1 and he still has accidents sometimes in the night and they always tend to be poop :vomit:Originally Posted by YellowFurBaby
Read your post yesterday and got interrupted so didn't finish my reply. IMO it sounds like you're on the right track. If Abbey is 12 weeks and only has pee accidents once in a while, it means YOU are taking her out at good intervals, and sounds like she's a fairly 'clean' pup too. She's really young yet to expect any more than she's doing. Just stay consistent. I may not have raised a TON of pups, but have done my share for myself and for other people. The length of time can depend a little on the dog, too. I usually start to see noticeable progress by the time they're 4-5 months old. I had one, though, that had regressed a bit while teething. Again, then after 6 months it was pretty good. Had another who was sweet, but didn't seem to grasp the 'outside' thing at all. Would NOT go pee completely outside, and the SECOND I brought her back in she'd finish emptying her bladder! It was like she thought THAT was when she was supposed to. She got the picture, though, just not as easily and quickly as others. Just stayed patient and consistent. Most of mine start to go to the door regularly around 5-6 months. Sometimes they DO need to pee or poop when they go to the door. Other times, they're just bored inside and want to go outside. I used to make the mistake of thinking I knew which it was, but the minute I'd think they didn't need to (because they just came in 5 minutes ago, for example) they'd prove me wrong and pee by the door. Made me feel horrible. So, I guess my point is that you just stay patient and consistent, and Abbey will begin going to the door, and being more and more reliable. There's no magical age for it IMO, but you should see noticeable progress as time goes on. But at 12 weeks, though, it would be VERY uncommon, and unfair to expect her to be totally housebroken.
Housetrain your MIL!
Seriously, ask your MIL how long it takes to potty train an infant, ask her if infants ever have accidents, and ask her how much more difficult she might think it would be to teach a species that does not speak the same language is. My father is the same way, and there is no point in having these conversations, I don't even try. The hard thing for you is her having access to your children, trying to instigate and upsetting your kids.... You might mention to your "dh" to speak w/ your MIL and tell her that this is not a positive approach and if it is not positive, it does not coincide w/ your parenting approach.... just some food for thought, or you could tell her your going to trade your MIL in for a new better model....
I am far from an expert on this but being consistant seems to be most important. With Casey we would always say potty outside and say potty outside once she was going. She now will go to the door on her own and wait for us or give a little whine at the door. We were originally giving her a treat outside but now have her wait until we get inside and she will instanly sit down at the counter area where the treat (kibble) will be giving to her.
At one point wife and I were at wits end as we were having pee accidents often and since I am home often I would not crate her and then a pee would happen. So I would crate her during times I thought she might be able to go if taking outside to teach her to hold it a bit longer and it seems to have worked well.
Casey was 11 weeks when we brought her home and is now 4 months old I guess and when she came home she two accidents (pee) int he crate the first two nights so we took her out at 1;30AM and then in the monring when we woke and dry crate. Then we pushed the time to 2AM and then 3 and now she goes the whole night with only being taken out at 10PM.
It seems from looking around here that every dog is different in this department. I still do not trust to leave Casey for any lenght of time if I walk out of a room to get something.