Four weeks ago on a beautiful day like this, we sat outside under a tree saying good-bye to our sweet, gorgeous , yellow English Lab. Just one week before we found out he had a liver tumor and on that day did not know he also had a large tumor in his abdomen. All we knew was he was throwing up everything, even water and we couldn't watch our boy who LOVED to eat starve to death in front of us. So he spent the day sniffing the breeze and putting up with our picture taking and caresses, even though he was weak and hungry and probably in pain by then. And then we had our vet put him out of his suffering and she was sobbing along with me because he was such a great dog and she always called him "Handsome" and he was only 9. Afterward she felt the tumor we hadn't known about.
So I am sitting here and I miss him so much. I miss him when I walk my other dog because Max walked right beside me and glanced over at my face every few minutes to make sure things were good. And I miss him when I am in our kitchen cause he was 90 lbs. and he took up a lot of space and now he isn't there. I miss him on days like this when he would lay on the tile fully stretched out and let out sighs or groans of contentment. I miss him when my other dog barks and Max doesn't join in with his stronger, deeper barking.
I think it is harder when you have them from a puppy because they are so much a part of the family and you care for them and train them. This week I went thru a lot of guilt because I started researching dog foods and treats and found out there are natural products that would have been better for Max. I wonder if I helped the cancer along by giving him treats with lots of preservatives and chemicals that I had NO idea were in them. If I could have a do over I would feed him all natural stuff the minute I brought him home and see if we could have him for 2 or 3 or 4 more years. No way we thought he would be gone at 9.
Don't think I can ever have another Lab, even though they are the best dogs in the entire world. I am afraid I would compare another dog to Max. But maybe one will come along at a rescue place and we will decide we can handle going thru this again, we'll see. All I know is that we miss him like crazy.
thanks for listening and sharing your stories, it has helped to read about other Labs going thru similiar things and being gone so fast and being missed so much
I am in tears reading your post. I'm so sorry for the loss of Max. ((hugs))
Cleo, our black beauty
Zeus, our yellow, mellow, fellow
I am so sorry you lost your Max so young . Know that he is at peace, pain free and watching over you. RIP Max, run free.
Maxx & Emma Jean
Ozzy - 10/16/02 - 06/28/11 - Always in my heart.
Sometimes the hardest part isn't letting go - but learning to start over.
Gentle enough for a 3 yr. old friend to walk him. We always loved his puppy face and his Labrador smile! We miss you, handsome boy.
Last edited by mrogers; 07-21-2012 at 09:21 AM.
I'm sorry for your loss. We lost our black lab girl to a large belly tumor as well just 2 short weeks ago. It was so hard to say goodbye but we are lucky that we can make the decision to let them go rather than watch them suffer. Treasure all the great times you had with your boy and know you gave him the best life for the time you had him. I think dogs love so completely that their little bodies can't handle it for as long as it takes a human to learn to love as much.
Getting easier after more time has passed. Walks still aren't the same, and I miss his greeting when we come into the house but not sad all the time anymore. The rescue place where we have been walking dogs has really helped. One of the Labs there makes the same huffing noise Max made when he is excited or happy. It gives me a happy memory of my boy.
Today I actually called a Pit Bull "sweetie pie", she is very sweet but I was never comfortable around that breed before volunteering at the dog rescue. All the happy dogs with doggy smiles and wagging tails has been so healing for our hearts.
Now we are working on my husband who doesn't want to be a two dog family for awhile, but it just feels wrong with only one. I really think rescue is the way for us to go from now on, there are so many dogs that need a home and an older dog seems more our energy level at this point in our lives.
Walmart can take a photograph and put the image on a pillow or blanket or poster. Thinking about having one made of Max...seems like it would be a wonderful way to keep him a part of our home.
It will get easier. You never really get over missing them but that is okay. They are such a huge part of our lives for such a short period of time. Keep yourself busy and give some love to the dogs you are working with and walking. I think any dog you rescue is a very lucky dog. Can't wait to hear what you decide and what great dog you'll be bringing home. We are bringing our puppy home next Friday and although I still feel guilty thinking Cinder might be hurt, I think it will be the best thing for is to help us heal.
sorry about your loss.
you need time.lots of time.
I am sorry. It takes time. I still think of Kassa and have the odd tear. I never thought I would have another heart dog or feel the same about a dog.
I adopted her litter mate Ernie and rescued Tessa last year. Both untrained.Not even house trained. It took time for Erns to worm his way into the place in my heart left by Kassa and Tessa it was the next day.
We can never replace them, but we can have other heart dogs.
Don't beat yourself up. For a long time I wondered what I should have done, or not seen or this or that. It clouds the special memories we have.
I'm sorry for your loss. Max was a very handsome boy. He knew he was loved. I hope memories comfort you.