Will he ever really LOVE me???
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Thread: Will he ever really LOVE me???

  1. #1
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    DefaultWill he ever really LOVE me???

    I have somewhat of a perhaps silly question. Will Woody ever really LOVE me??? Woody (choc. Male) is now about 4 months old and I was in hopes that he would be a lot more attached and affectionate to me by now. Is it still too early? Will it get better as he ages and matures? We play together well but a majority of the time he seems more than content to just do his own thing. I often have to grab his head just to make him make eye-contact with me. Does this make sense? From reading of some of the relationships on this board between Lab and owner it would seem some Labs are almost literally attached to their masters. I would love this! What do you all think? Is it his temperament to be aloof or just his age? Thanks for the input!

    God bless,

    Pastor Charlie

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  3. #2
    Beerfish's Avatar
    Beerfish is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Will he ever really LOVE me???

    I found with my dog that he was less affectionate when he was younger. As you said my dog would do his own thing, not be overly interested in laying down beside me etc. We got along well but he was not a love bug. As he has matured he has become more of a close buddy. I wouldn't worry at all If I was you, 4 months is not a long time.

  4. #3
    kaytris is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Will he ever really LOVE me???

    Making eye contact is a human desire, not one natural to dogs.

    Seriously think he's not bonded to you? Try this: Find a friend that doesn't know him well, go for a walk, and part way through, seperate, leaving Woody with your friend. Dollars to donuts Woody will be wanting to go with you, not stay with the stranger.

    Does he not get excited and happy when you get home?

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  6. #4
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    DefaultRe: Will he ever really LOVE me???

    Some dogs aren't extremely affectionate, especially if you are affectionate enough for the both of you (if you know what I mean).
    Dogs are like pretty girls....the more you follow them around begging for attention and affection the less likely they are to give it to you.

    I would not suggest forcing any type of eye contact either, especially in a young dog because direct eye contact can be a dominant, aggressive signal. This type of action can make a dog very uncomfortable because dogs don't gaze lovingly into each others eyes as a signal of affection. Usually dogs who are in tune to each other look in the same general direction. One of Leo's favorite things to do as a youngster was to sit beside me and just look off into the horizon together. He would occassionally turn his head in my direction and nuzzle my face or neck.

    I would suggest to you that you need to relax...your dog will absolutely love you, but you can't control the way in which he shows affection. Don't beg for attention. Ignore him a little. Don't be mean, just a little more aloof. He will learn to ask for your attention (which to humans usually translates into "affection")

    Good luck with your new dog.

    What denomonation are you?

  7. #5
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    DefaultRe: Will he ever really LOVE me???

    Quote Originally Posted by kaytris
    Making eye contact is a human desire, not one natural to dogs.

    Seriously think he's not bonded to you? Try this: Find a friend that doesn't know him well, go for a walk, and part way through, seperate, leaving Woody with your friend. Dollars to donuts Woody will be wanting to go with you, not stay with the stranger.

    Does he not get excited and happy when you get home?
    We were posting at the same time, but this is a great point. I always thought Leo was the most independent dog, but I had people tell me when I would leave him as a young dog, he would whine and look in my direction until I came back or they were able to distract him. When I broke my leg and Melissa kept my dogs for me while I was in the hospital and recovering it was Leo who showed symptoms of being depressed and he is still my least openly affectionate of the four.

  8. #6
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    DefaultRe: Will he ever really LOVE me???

    Quote Originally Posted by kaytris
    Does he not get excited and happy when you get home?
    Somewhat.....but not as much as I'd like for him to be........ya know?

  9. #7
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    DefaultRe: Will he ever really LOVE me???

    Quote Originally Posted by Page
    What denomonation are you?
    Baptist

  10. #8
    amazongold's Avatar
    amazongold is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Will he ever really LOVE me???

    Our Buddy was about eight months old when we adopted him on May 6th. He was totally non-affectionate. He'd be happy to see us when we came home, but after the initial greeting, he was off doing his own thing. Now Buddy is becoming more affectionate as time goes on and he matures. He now makes eye contact much more often. Training helped a lot with that part - especially the "leave it" command. When you can, get your pup into an obedience class and you will see a big difference ... in both of you!
    Jackie, Champ, and Buddy

  11. #9
    Karolyn is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Will he ever really LOVE me???

    Harlee will be 8 mths on Dec 29th, she is still not affectionate...she just Loves people (not just me) hahahahhaah
    SHe doesnt care if I am around...just as long as someone is

    And btw when she was younger..I posted the same question :0

  12. #10
    kaytris is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Will he ever really LOVE me???

    Quote Originally Posted by Pastor Charlie

    Somewhat.....but not as much as I'd like for him to be........ya know?
    Like a child, or any breathing creature, Woody is his own person, with likes, dislikes, and behavioural patterns. Forcing him into a human version of 'liking you' by guiding eye contact, constant demands of physical caresses etc, expecting him to jump around like a lunatic when you return (for example - not saying you do this) is a sure way to lose his trust and make him LESS likely to want to engage with you.

    Step back, relax, and wait. Take an obedience class, teach him good manners and proper behaviour, and wait for him to tell you what he likes, dislikes and prefers.

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