Do I Or Don't I???
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Thread: Do I Or Don't I???

  1. #1
    bebopalula is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultDo I Or Don't I???

    Okay, I'm starting to scheme and thought I probably could use some sane,level-headed advice before I make a big mistake. Here's the thing: Hubby is going to be away for a week in December. I will be home with my girl Breezy. She is just shy of 11 months old. We have never had her sleep in our bed with us. ( ). I would like her to, but Hubby says No. She sleeps in her crate in the kitchen, and actually is quite used to it by now. My wheels are spinning about the time he will be away...... : I am thinking of sleeping in the guest bedroom, and letting Breezy sleep with me. I would so like to snuggle with her in a comfy situation! Right now since Hubby won't let her sleep with us, I am forced to snuggle with her on her doggie bed on the kitchen floor.......and it is only for a little while as most of me is hanging off and the kitchen floor is hard!
    I am just worried that if I allow her to sleep with me in the guest bedroom, that after that, when I put her in her crate she will not be happy. Right now we are at the point where when we put her in the crate, she settles down and goes to sleep, or if she doesn't go to sleep right away, at least she doesn't cry or bark. She knows it's sleepy time, and that is where she sleeps. If I let her sleep with me while Hubby's away, that will probably screw things up, won't it? I don't want to do that. But man this would be my chance to snuggle with Breezy for an entire week. Alright, there it is. I think in my gut I already know the answer to this, but I'd still like to hear some outside opinions. Thanks!

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  3. #2
    Di
    Di is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Do I Or Don't I???

    IMO, unless she will be able to sleep with you all the time, you would be messing with her! What about snuggling with her on the couch before bed time each night! This way she sleeps where she will every other night, but you get snuggle time! Sammi doesnt sleep with us, but snuggles with either DH or myself everynight, but " night night time" means she goes to her bed, she loves it there and we get a good night sleep! I am a very light sleeper and just cannot share the bed with anyone but DH!

  4. #3
    TobysTrix is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Do I Or Don't I???

    I can only offer you advice based on my own experience. But once we let Toby in the bed (after his neutering because DH felt bad for him : ), there was no going back. Same with Chamois. She was very happy in her crate at night, but when we moved to Libya we didn't bring that crate, so in the bed it was. Now I try to encourage them to either sleep on the floor or on the (very nice) dog bed that's in the bedroom. They might start there, but guaranteed they'll be up on the bed sometime during the night and will stay there until morning.

    I also like snuggling with them, but I do sometimes wish I didn't share the bed with 175 pounds of dog as well as a husband.
    Toby and Chamois say: GO STEELERS!
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  6. #4
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    2labcrew is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Do I Or Don't I???

    My guys are not allowed on the furniture or the beds...or upstairs for that matter. ONCE, I let Kodi up on the sofa with me when DH was traveling. This was a HUGE problem, as once I let him do it, he thought it was OK for all the time. I realized that I had messed with him and gave him the OK for something he had no concept of ...that it could only be every once in awhile when daddy was away. So I came to a compromise with the DH. As long as there is a covering (a sheet) on the sofa, they are allowed to put their front legs up on my lap and have snuggles that way. So far it has worked well. But, what started out as an invitation has developed into everytime I put my butt on the sofa, they are on my lap too. They just don't understand "sometimes", and it's not fair for them. So I would say unless she can sleep in there (with you all) the time, I woudln't do it. I knwo it sucks b/c what is better than laby snuggles? But, it's not fair to confuse them.
    Miriam , Digger, and Kodi


  7. #5
    Chester B. Dickens is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Do I Or Don't I???

    Dogs do best in worlds of black and white behaviorwise. It's either okay, or it's not, and if it's okay once, it's okay a zillion times thereafter. They do not quite get the concept of a 'gray' issue.

    I say hold your ground.

  8. #6
    BoatDog is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Do I Or Don't I???

    Agree! If you allow her in when he's gone, make sure she is still allowed in once he's home. ALL OR NOTHING!

  9. #7
    bebopalula is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Do I Or Don't I???

    That's what I thought. Guess we'll have to stick to the living room floor since he doesn't want her on the furniture either. :-\ Thanks for the feedback!

  10. #8
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    DefaultRe: Do I Or Don't I???

    Quote Originally Posted by dweck
    Dogs do best in worlds of black and white behaviorwise. It's either okay, or it's not, and if it's okay once, it's okay a zillion times thereafter. They do not quite get the concept of a 'gray' issue.

    I say hold your ground.
    Yup! Sorry.

  11. #9
    Bob Pr. is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Do I Or Don't I???

    I agree with all the others. No gray area. No sometimes. All or nothing.

    But consider a variation on Dipete's suggestion -- do you have an air mattress and sleeping bag you can put on the floor and let her sleep next to you? Then that wouldn't be on the forbidden furniture or bed.
    Puff [YF, AKC field line (from competing HT/FT breeder) 62 lbs, dob: 8-'01]

    Bess [BF, AKC bench line (from competing show breeder) 55 lbs., 1967-1981] "Poor Bess, the Wonder Dog":
    http://forum.justlabradors.com/showt...?p=748#post748

  12. #10
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    georgie is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: Do I Or Don't I???

    I agree with the others. If you let her in your bed when your husband is away.....she will not understand going back to the crate when he comes home. She is happy there...I wouldn't change things if it will not be a permanent thing.
    Our girls sleep in our bed & once they both started to sleep there...there was no going back to the crates at night.

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