What do you think.
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Thread: What do you think.

  1. #1
    Beachboys is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultWhat do you think.

    Ok, little back ground. Mambo plays rough. But its play. However a dog started playing real rough with him. I have been saying stuff to the owner. What it making me upset is this. The dog only acts like this with Mambo. But what she does is grab his face, neck and bites, she wont let go. Most of the time Mambo wont cry. But what I am worried about is this. When the other dog bites down and doesn't let go, I am worried that while running she or mambo will trip and she tears off side of his face. Mambo doesnt like going around her most of the time.

    Anyways, most of the time the owner is great. He will attempt to get his dog to let go of Mambo. Now because of this. I have really been on Mambo about getting to rough. When I think he is playing to rough I will make him sit down and chill. If he tries to hump another dog I do the same.

    Well the other owners are telling me I need to let Mambo work it out. That Mambo will get sick of being chewed on and one day fight back..

    But I dont want him too. I am very happy with him not wanting to try and hurt another dog. I dont want to have to worry if Mambo thinks he needs to roll another dog over to show that he isnt a wimp. I like him as a wimp. Mambo has never growled at another dog, never tried to hurt another dog. Not to say he is an angel. But he is all about playing. I know at times it gets rough and I am now correcting it. I feel like I shouldnt tell other owners to keep the dogs off Mambo if I will allow him to do the same thing.

    But now I am being told that Mambo needs to defend himself, that nature will work things out. Mambo needs to get bitten to tell him what he can and cant do..WTH?? I dont see this as ok. I dont want Mambo to get hurt because he wanted to hump another dog. I would rather him learn from me just not to hump. But they say its not natural.

    Does me correcting Mambo make him a wimp? Would you do the same thing I am doing? Should I let nature takes it course? even at Mambos cost?

    Sorry, guess I am venting more. but I dont understand how so many people can agree with this. why am I the only one there that doesn't think this is ok.


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  3. #2
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    DefaultRe: What do you think.

    my take on it is, being female, we naturally want to "make nice" in situations like this; I was that way when my son was growing up. From Mambo's perspective, though, he might feel he's being attacked, or at least bullied, but instead of defending himself, you're teaching him not to. He could be getting the idea that he has to "take it", or you'll be upset. Not really what he needs to feel. I would say, as hard as it is for a "mom" to do, you need to step back and give him a chance to defend himself and show this dog that 'enough's enough'. If things really get ugly, you can step in and stop it before any real damage is done. But teaching him not to fight back could well be making him "a wimp". My son still throws that up to me, how wrong I was to not let him "be a male". Just my opinion on it.

  4. #3
    Beachboys is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: What do you think.

    I see that point. I guess I am just worried he will be hurt. He tries to get away from the rough dogs that ar ebiting him. He is 1.5 and has never went at it with another dog. Some people say he just doesn't have it in him. I have just started stepping in within the last few weeks, maybe three weeks. He was already a wimp before I even got into it...lol

    I want him to stick up for himself, but I am worried once he does it may go to far. I would feel bad if one day he did stick up for himself and has ripped a hole into another dogs face. or if he gets hurt. I guess he is my BABY and I dont want to see him get hurt.

    I would rather him be the loving wimp than the the oposite. But thats why I am here asking now. I would like to see how others see this.

    for example, when most dogs are being humped by another dog they will growl, or make it known they dont like it. But mambo will just roll over and lay on the ground until the dog goes away.

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  6. #4
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    DefaultRe: What do you think.

    I actually have a similar situation right now going on with Grady. Between Sage and Lacey picking on him all the time, they've really turned him into a nervous, timid guy. He tries to avoid them, mostly Lacey, and even checks to see if either of them are around when I offer him a biscuit. If he sees one of them, he backs away and won't take it. I have to make him take it. Or he'll hide under the computer desk when I'm sitting here to chew on his rawhide - I believe either to hide from Lacey or to find some protection. It's hard for me to watch this, but I know I have to let him get into it a little just to show himself that he can handle it. At times he gets angry and lets her have it - almost like he's finally said "leave me ALONE!!". If it gets too wild I stop them both. I know just how you feel, because it's hard for me to watch that too, but I don't like seeing Grady too timid to do things in his own house, either. I think this is also beneficial to Lacey, to show her that there's a limit to what she can do before she has consequences herself - maybe a learning experience for them both?

  7. #5
    Beachboys is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: What do you think.

    I have a situation like that at my house with my cats. My older kitty gets beat up daily. But see Mambo isnt timid at all. Not even close. He just Doesnt fight, if that makes sense. He is all about getting tough and playing bitey face or wrestling. I would even say he is the one that starts it with most dogs, playing that is. he isnt afraid of any dog unless they have hurt him. Than he just tries to stay away or he will drop to the ground.

    I just dont like watching him cry when another dog is latched onto his face and wont let go. Thats when I step in. I also dont step in if he is getting humped, I let him work it out. I just wont allow him to hump another dog. I dont think the other dog should have to even deal with my humping Mambo.

    Guess I need to let him grow up. But when is it to much?? How do you know when to leave him alone, or if he really needs help?

  8. #6
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    DefaultRe: What do you think.

    well, I would say if he's crying, then it's time to step in. Especially if the other dog seems to be enjoying this just a little bit too much. What does the other dog's owner do while this is happening? I guess it's a fine line we have to walk. What does Jerome say about it? Does he ever take Mambo there himself? It might be interesting to see how Mambo deals with this with him there instead of you, not with both of you. Maybe Mambo knows you reeeeeally don't want him to fight, so he's trying to "be good for your sake". Why not have Jerome take him once and see if Mambo reacts the same for him?

  9. #7
    Beachboys is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: What do you think.

    The owner at first would say,let them work it out. But he has started saying he isn't sure why willow has become so agressive towards Mambo. Really all this is really about one dog. Most dogs there do not play like this. Most dogs will try and play with mambo rough and he is all about it. but just the biting the face and not letting go really bothers him. well atleast I think it does.

    The owner thinks she does this to Mambo because he wont fight back. she doesnt bite any other dog.

    Jerome goes to the park most of the time with me.He also takes Mambo himself when I am running late from work.He doesn't like it either, but we may be feeding into each other. He has seen the bite marks on Mambo from this dog and it upsets him. He has even wanted to confront the owner, which by the way. we really like them. mambo has played with this girl for more than a year. This just started within the last few months.

  10. #8
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    Baloo317 is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: What do you think.

    NANCY!! (Kaytris) Where is that article??

    I think that humans need to step in when dogs are playing too rough/being rude. You said that Mambo is uncomfortable with this other dog, I firmly believe that the onus is on the owner to ensure that their dog is comfortable and feeling safe at all times.

    I have heard the archaic "let dogs be dogs" argument over and over, but sometimes letting dogs be dogs can have some very unpleasant and many times even dangerous consequences.

    I believe that when I take my dogs to the dog park, it is my responsibility to ensure that they are not bullied, and that they do not bully others. After watching dogs interacting for a long long time it has become relatively easy for me to see when a dog is having a good time, and when they are not. If I feel Baloo or Peanut is being "bullied" I will say something to the owners. If I feel that they are "bullying", I will step in and address the behaviour.

    In my experience, people who say "let them work it out, stay out of it" often own bully-type dogs. :

    note: I am not using the term "bully" in the context of breed reference, it refers only to a style of behaviour.

    Know what I mean?

    Amanda, I think that if you are uncomfortable, your "dog-momma-instincts" () are telling you that something isn't right.
    Kate
    Baloo - 5 year old black lab
    Peanut - 7 year old minpin
    Monster - 3-ish year old frenchie/jack, rescue
    We're Superdogs!


  11. #9
    MyLabsMom is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: What do you think.

    Geez, I've read this a couple times now....and I'm really not sure what I would do. I'm trying to put myself in your shoes. My Max is a "rough" player..but he doesn't mean it - he just never socialized with other dogs at an early age and is just plain ol' rude when he plays. I correct him depending on who/where/what the situation is. If he's playing with dogs he knows and sees a lot and I know can handle him (like our 130 lb. Newfie neighbor), then I don't. If I think he's getting to be too much, then I step in and redirect.

    As mentioned, I think you need to go with your gut -
    Brenda from Connecticut

  12. #10
    Beachboys is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: What do you think.

    Mambo would do great with Max. He loves to get REALLY rough. I guess the main issue is the biting and not letting go. Now I haven't mentioned this before. But Willow is a pit. Not to say anything bad about pits. But when she latches onto his neck and wont let go, it scares me. Mambo tries to twist and get away, which worries me could be worse. I am just waiting for her to rip his skin. Now she isn't like this with any other dog I have ever seen. and she plays there every signle day. it's just mambo

    Could she be reading that Mambo is maybe scared of her and thats why she does it? Do dogs even think that way? There is another dog that mambo doesnt like. This dog has never hurt Mambo. doesnt even play with him. But if the dog walks near Mambo, mambo will drop to the ground. The thing is, this dog is maybe 20 pounds. It's not that he is scared of little dogs. just this one. This dog seems to know he gets to mambo and always tries to bully him around. Maybe he is truly a punk..lol

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