For Fun - Write your Lab a Classified Ad
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Thread: For Fun - Write your Lab a Classified Ad

  1. #1
    Chester B. Dickens is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultFor Fun - Write your Lab a Classified Ad

    *******************************
    WANTED - ONE SUNNY SPOT

    Preferably in living room, next to a sofa. In a home where the humans are smart enough to realize that the crinkly deli wrap that American Cheese comes in can be heard just about anywhere in the house. And that once heard, a sample of said cheese must follow, no matter where/when. Cookies must be plentiful and given generously. Air vents within the home must be clear, especially in summers, when they provide exquisite relief from the heat when laid upon. Same clearances in winter for spots next to the fireplace. Year 'round attitude should be: Exercise in moderation; naps in excess.

    Call Wesley: 610/55-SNORE
    *******************************

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  3. #2
    tuckersmom is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: For Fun - Write your Lab a Classified Ad

    ************************************************** *****************************

    WANTED : A Stay at Home Mom

    Fun-loving 75lb momma's boy looking for a new Mom to stay at home with me all day/everyday. Unfortunately the five-day-a-week cycle of sad goodbyes and joyful hello's with current mom has become a nasty inconvenience. SAHM must understand that her role is to ensure my ultimate comfort, whether that be fluffing my dog bed so that the middle is no longer dented or rubbing my belly with just the right amount of pressure. Said mom must understand that though I cannot speak English, I do have an advanced language of signals, most notably using my eyes to tell you what I want; sitting in front the couch and staring at you means 'move the cushions so I can get up,' sitting at the stairs and staring at you means 'I need to go out and I can't open the door myself you know.' SAHM must be willing to give up social activities in lieu of trips to the dog park, where she is welcome to fraternize with other dog servants ... errr ... mothers. SAHM must also hone the routines of cheesy egg on a Sunday and PB regularly.

    In return, SAHM will be rewarded with sloppy and incessant kisses, an occasional surprise nose in the tush and a living, breathing, shedding, hot blanket strewn across her as she watches tv (programming to be discussed at interview but likely to include a constant stream of animal shows). As well, studies have shown that people with pets live longer. I believe this to be fair compensation.

    Serious Inquiries only please!
    Call Tucker: 555-lazy
    ************************************************** *****************************

  4. #3
    Brigettas Mom is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: For Fun - Write your Lab a Classified Ad

    WANTED: A sister or brother.

    Crazy, yet sweet one year old chocolate female seeking fun, adventurous best friend. Chocolate, black, or yellow are acceptable, however my mother would prefer black. I love to play soccer, bitey face, retrieve tennis balls, run, jump in the shower, lick nonstop, and snuggle. You must be willing to aid and embed when stealing lip balm and counter surfing. It is preferred, but not required that you lick my mother's face between 5:30 and 6am to get her up. If she does not comply, you must then be willing to throw your entire body on top of hers.
    I'm really just looking for a fellow labby to play and snuggle with

    Call Brigetta (AKA: Crazy) @ 803/LIK-ALOT

    Teresa, mom to Brigetta and Prudence

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  6. #4
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    DefaultRe: For Fun - Write your Lab a Classified Ad

    Wanted: Rural piece of property, about 5 miles square. Must contain open grassy fields suitable for all out running, games of chuck-it, stick, and bitey face. Need wooded areas with healthy, heart strong deer suitable for chasing, and other kinds of interesting wildlife, suitable for smelling. No skunks. Must have several lakes, well stocked with ducks. Would like many big shady trees for resting under , and open sandy beaches for sunning on. Neighbors should have friendly labs who will come over daily to run and play. Above all, it must come with a tireless human person who will throw bumpers, run blinds, shoot birds, and participate in long walks, as needed, aka almost constantly.
    Compensation commensurate with experience, enthusiasm and expertise. Call 1-800-I Am A Lab.

    Frances

  7. #5
    labby's Avatar
    labby is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: For Fun - Write your Lab a Classified Ad

    HEY BABY!!

    Looking to add some color to your life? Call me.

    Seamus 810-555-1212



    Laura





  8. #6
    Rushpuppy's Avatar
    Rushpuppy is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: For Fun - Write your Lab a Classified Ad

    Wanted: Good home(?) for a black female lab. She is just a little over a year old, annoying, vocal, a food hog, leg biter, poopcicle eater, string drooler, waste basket scrounge and a toy thief. New family must have lots of patience, a big yard and another lab much much bigger than above mentioned sister, er I mean lab. I would consider a trade for a box of cookies, rawhide chewie, new toy, a new pair of slippers for mom or a butt scratch. If interested please call 555-PITA (pain in the A$$) ask for Rush. If human mom or dad answers, don't under any circumstances discuss this ad with them.


  9. #7
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    DefaultRe: For Fun - Write your Lab a Classified Ad

    These are cute! C'mon y'all, do some more!!!!!!

    Frances

  10. #8
    Join Date
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    DefaultRe: For Fun - Write your Lab a Classified Ad

    WANTED: Home for "brother" to go to

    In need of a home (good or otherwise) for my brother, James the cat. James is fun loving (*coughs*), easy going (*snickers*), and 20 or more pounds of pure JOY! ALWAYS friendly (*laughs out loud*), James will treat you like the master you are! (*rolling on floor laughing*) I would REALLY hate to see him go, but there is just not room for both of us here. Please call if at ALL interested - no personal visits neccesary and owner will HAND deliver this "special" delivery if accepted. Oh, by the way, he's FREE!!!
    Call Sam @ 1-800-take-a-cat!

    *asteriks indicate Sam's actions as writing the personal add! ;D

  11. #9
    kassabella's Avatar
    kassabella is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultRe: For Fun - Write your Lab a Classified Ad

    Wanted.
    Energetic person to for a charming, male fish dressed in Black Labradors clothes. Must love the water, and live in a run down house far end of no where.

    Must not care about trivial things like gardens, curtains, decent bedding, carpets, couches or eating meals which will regularly be stolen.
    Must be fit in case of needing to chase said fish, willing to share personal pillow and bed at all hours of day and night, no allergies to fur left which will lay around in bigger clusters than dust bunnies, and be willing to shell out hundreds of dollars for vet bills.

    If all this sounds like the man of your dreams please call Ernie on 0881256 ;D



    Kassa waiting for me to come home.

    Kassa 25/11/01 - 09/02/05 O.S Jaw cancer forever in my heart.
    Ernie 25/11/01 adopted May 05
    Sam 11? adopted Nov 06 - 18/12/07 Lyphoma
    Tessa. Rescued June 2011.
    Bone Cancer Dogs org.http://www.bonecancerdogs.org/
    http://kassabella.tripod.com/kassabella/
    http://collarsbychris.weebly.com/

  12. #10
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    DefaultRe: For Fun - Write your Lab a Classified Ad

    Sexy, Rubenesque female with lots of butt wiggles in search of a young, energetic male, color and age not important as long as you can keep up with me baby.
    Call 301-555-1212

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