Sharing an Ernie dead bird story.
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Thread: Sharing an Ernie dead bird story.

  1. #1
    kassabella's Avatar
    kassabella is offline Senior Member
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    DefaultSharing an Ernie dead bird story.

    Seven years with us is a special event so thought I would share a couple of our favourite stories.Many will remeber.

    When I rang to book into the first aid class they told me my dog had to be under control. Ummm I didn't think I took the dog. Mmm.. Well yes he is obedient. I figured on a lead I could control him.

    The day came. I had been sick all week and my voice had all but gone and I sounded like a chipmunk, but I didn’t want to miss the first one and tossed up which dog to take. Sam was on Prednisone so a bit smelly.

    There were mostly lap dogs and a couple of dogs smaller than Erns and all nicely dressed. I had jeans and sweater and felt my big black dog and I were out of place. One man with a poodle really didn’t like Erns and poodle kept yapping which made it worse.

    The instructor a sergeant major type said to get into pairs then commented there should be more than one big dog. She had no sooner finished than a dishevelled woman (Sue) ran in with an equally dishevelled dog a bit smaller than Erns.

    Erns butt started talking when we were bandaging our dogs. I was hoping no one would notice, but after Sue piped up she knew that dead bird smell anywhere, I had to admit Erns had eaten one or 2 the day before. He had destuffed them leaving 2 beaks and a head on the coffee table.

    The instructor finished showing us CPR on a Poodle then said bring the Lab as it is different with big dogs. Oh No.!!!! he is bad enough controlling now let alone on the little table with an audience.
    Instructor in her sergeant major voice "Come on.. we haven’t got all night." Please Erns behave.

    Everyone was crowded around the table while she was demonstrated when we heard PPPPPfffffttttt.... Pffffttt... and Erns looked at his butt. OMG no Ernie. Poodle man was closest and reeled away in horror with his hand over his nose saying “eeeewwwww You dirty black Labrador.” Sue was screeching with laughter. More Pppfffts. I was moritifed with embarrasment as everyone moved away from the horrendous smell.

    The instructor said. “What in gods name do you feed that dog.” I tried to say “yesterday he ate a dead bird” but all that came out in a chipmunk voice was “dead birds”

    The instructor yelled. “You feed your dog dead birds. Good god woman. Dead birds...” Sue who is now almost rolling on the floor managed to say he ate a dead bird. I just wanted the ground to swallow me.

    By now everyone except Poodle man was snickering and Erns realising no one was attached to his lead thought party party. He was off running around the room, stopping beside the poodle. I knew by the way he was positioning himself on one good leg he was going to pee on it. No Ernie...No... No point yelling as no one could hear.I pulled off my shoe and threw it at him to distract him. To my horror it missed him hit the wall, bounced off and hit the poodle as Erns peed on it. Poodle man picked up his dog shouting “you and your dirty black bstard.” I just wanted to die.

    The instructor gave me lecture about dogs being under control and told me to take him away.
    I said I had a yellow boy in the car.
    No.. Go...go home tonight and bring the yellow one next week.

    Kassa 25/11/01 - 09/02/05 O.S Jaw cancer forever in my heart.
    Ernie 25/11/01 adopted May 05
    Sam 11? adopted Nov 06 - 18/12/07 Lyphoma
    Tessa. Rescued June 2011.
    Bone Cancer Dogs org.http://www.bonecancerdogs.org/
    http://kassabella.tripod.com/kassabella/
    http://collarsbychris.weebly.com/

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  3. #2
    TBGSAM is offline Senior Member
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    LOL I am laughing so hard right now that has got to be one of the most hilarious stories I have ever heard. Thank you!
    Coleman - CGC blk lab 6/02/97-2/25/08 adopted
    Tootsie - choc lab 10/19/99-8/03/13 adopted
    Bailey - CGC newf/fc 7/12/00-07/15/14 rescued
    Ginger - BT 11/16/05 rescued
    Sarah - blk lab 6/22/06 rescued
    rescued felines - AJ - 8/00 - 1/11, Merlin - 5/20/05, Tucker - 8/3/10, Penny - 7/7/13

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    MidwestGirl is offline Senior Member
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    The instructor said. “What in gods name do you feed that dog.” I tried to say “yesterday he ate a dead bird” but all that came out in a chipmunk voice was “dead birds”

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    bigbrownsmom is offline Senior Member
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    OMG!!! Giggling at work!!!!

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    Rukus&Dozer is offline Senior Member
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    OMG that is hilarious! I can totally picture it happening too.

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    lilypi is offline Senior Member
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    I was just in hysterics reading this to hubby. What a tale!
    Laura & Maddox

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    Labmom2Sun is offline Senior Member
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    Oh, that's hilarious. I think I like this better than the one where Ernie stole a fish.

    Seriously, Chris, I think you need to write a book. You write so well and Erns has given you an abundance of material.

    Laura, mom of Sundance, CGC
    born 1/16/06

  10. #8
    tkeizer is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Labmom2Sun View Post
    Oh, that's hilarious. I think I like this better than the one where Ernie stole a fish.
    OMG -- laughing so hard right now!! I don't know the fish story - I think you should write an Ernie story every day!

  11. #9
    Mary Jane is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Labmom2Sun View Post
    Oh, that's hilarious. I think I like this better than the one where Ernie stole a fish.

    Seriously, Chris, I think you need to write a book. You write so well and Erns has given you an abundance of material.
    Quote Originally Posted by tkeizer View Post
    OMG -- laughing so hard right now!! I don't know the fish story - I think you should write an Ernie story every day!
    They are both right!!! I was laughing so hard my Granddaughter wanted to know why!!!
    I had not heard this story nor have I heard the fish story.......................please tell!!!
    I would think you and Sue formed a good friendship bond over that???

  12. #10
    mombear is offline Senior Member
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    I LOVE ERNS. NO TWO WAYS ABOUT IT, I LOVE ERNS.

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