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My babies last day :(

8K views 20 replies 19 participants last post by  grlzmommy 
#1 ·
Summer's death was COMPLETELY unexpected and I think that is making this so much harder. In our eyes she was perfectly fine! She was just getting older and slowing down some. She still had her spunk for all the things that excited her, she was eating and drinking fine, nothing out of the normal at all. I started running/jogging with her about 3 miles 3 days a week for the last few months as much as I could, but now that the my daughters were in school it was great! I looked forward to these days to just spend with summer for a couple hours while they were in school! So as soon as I dropped them off I'd come home and we'd go for our walk/run. Yesterday I came home, got ready she was all excited to go, pulling the leash like normal in the beginningI was about 15 minutes into it when I noticed she was really lagging behind I almost had to pull her to keep her going, so I stopped and walked her home very slowly. I just chalked it up to her being tired or maybe her joints were starting to hurt from running so often, so she layed on my bed and I went back out for about 20 minutes to finish and when I came back I went right to her in my room and she was still panting and I looked at her gums and they were very pale and cold....I called the vet right away and brought her in....she wouldn't even get up when I grabbed her leash and I had to carry her to the car she wouldn't even walk. I knew something had to be seriously wrong for all this to happen so quick...I was so scared for her, she was panting a lot too. So they xrayed her at the vet and they saw she had a lot of fluid around her heart.I knew it wasn't good when it had to do with her heart. They didn't "fix" that kind of thing at the vet I was at so I had to go 30 minutes into the city to the vet hospital and they were afraid she wouldn't make the drive. They had to rush her in the back to give her oxygen and the dr. stuck a needle into her chest to relieve some of the pressure and drew out a lot of the fluid. She only did this to get us to make it to the vet hospital. After she had the fluid drained she looked a lot better, the fluid they said was compressing her heart. Unfortunately they said usually it's caused from a tumor. So off we went to the vet hospital with her, she looked better but still not herself, but well enough to walk into the vet hospital. They did an echocardiogram and they found that she had a hemangiosarcoma tumor on her heart that had a lot of vasculature involved. Any treatment would be invasive and it would probably only give her 5 more months and that kind of surgery wasn't even done that often and apparently her tumor was larger than they normally see. So her prognosis was really poor. At that time she was doing better the pressure was relieved and we decided just to take her home and spend time with her. They would give us medicine to help prevent more bleeding around the heart. I was checking out and waiting for her and the dr. came out urgentlyand said that she was going downhill again that the fluid was building up around her heart. They could do the needle again and relieve the fluid but it was filling up a lot faster than they expected and she looked worse than the first time it happened. So we had to make the heart wrenching decision to let her go. My husband and I went in to be with her and she lifted her head for us and then relaxed. I didn't want her to be in any pain. She went to sleep peacefully. They brought her to a private room for us so we could spend some time with her, especially since everything happened so quickly. I hugged her so tight I didn't want to let go, How was I going to walk out of there without my baby???? How was I going to tell the girls???? Adriana fed her in the morning they said they'd see them soon and now they are coming home to this...I just wasn't prepared for any of it. We woke up everything was fine....how did this happen?? I'm still in shock....I hardly slept last night. I missed her in bed with us squishing up next to our legs, I missed her coming into the girls rooms with me to tuck them in for bed, I missed feeding her her dinner, and letting her out to go to the bathroom, I missed her kisses this morning trying to get me up out of bed to feed her. Everything I did she was involved. My heart hurts soo soooo much, I know she is in a better place, but she was ripped from us too soon. I feel like a huge part of me is missing. She was a part of my life since the beginning of my marriage, she was there for me for everything, she was on every vacation with us, she was there for me through everything, When I went in the hospital to have Adriana I even had her picture there with me, b/c I missed her!I knew she wouldn't be with us forever but I thought I had at least 10 years with her. Adriana is so upset, she keeps crying and wishing summer had another birthday. She loved walking summer and summer was so good for her with walking on the leash. If you've made it this far reading I thank you so much. It helps to get it out b/c not everyone understands the love for animals that we have.
 
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#7 ·
I am so very sorry for your loss. We lost our last old girl similarly. She was fine, no problems, then suddenly couldn't stand and was panting. We rushed to the vet and about 15 minutes later she was gone. She was 12. It was an abdominal aneurysm that burst. I can empathize with you. I am here if you need to talk.
 
#8 ·
I am also sorry for your loss. Cinder went quickly as well and I felt cheated out of the time she should have still had. Abbey is almost 13 and although she may be nearing her end, I feel more at peace since she has lived such a blessed and loved life. My thoughts are with you.
 
#9 ·
Our dogs are our children. Sometimes I feel that my pup is easier going than my kids with 2 legs.

I refused to get a dog for years based on the bad memories I had as a teenager when we lost a dog. After seeing friends with dogs I realized what I was missing.
 
#10 ·
I am so sorry for your loss. We never have them long enough. Summer knew she was loved. I lost one lab at 9 1/2 to hemangiosarcoma & we lost Molly to lymphoma at 8 1/2. I understand what you are going through. May the good memories of her give you comfort. As much as losing them broke mt heart, I never would have traded the time I had with them for anything. Time will help the pain & she will always be in your heart.
 
#12 ·
Thank You all for your kind words! She's definitely missed around here but I find myself smiling more thinking of all of our happy memories. I'm glad she never had to suffer and lived doing everything she loved until her last day.
 
#13 ·
I am so sorry for you loss, Run Free, Summer!
Thank You all for your kind words! She's definitely missed around here but I find myself smiling more thinking of all of our happy memories. I'm glad she never had to suffer and lived doing everything she loved until her last day.
And that, is exactly how it should be. She knew she was loved, which enabled her to love life.
 
#16 ·
sorry for your loss. We lost Max four months ago within a week of finding out he had a tumor, so I know how losing them so quickly hurts. Every month I find that I have a few really sad days when he comes to my mind, and I look at the calendar and it is always the anniversary of his death. My sub conscious must be aware of the date , even if I am not thinking about it. It will get easier as time goes past but I think we will always miss them.
 
#19 ·
May the good memories of her give you comfort. As much as losing them broke my heart, I never would have
traded the time I had with them for anything. Time will help the pain & she will always be in your heart.
Ditto.

Your post brought tears to my eyes as I remembered the end of my time with Bess (see link in
my siggy below) and dread going through a similar loss with my Puff -- now eleven years old.

And, while I empathize with your grief, I'm more concerned with that of your daughters.

This sad event gives you the opportunity to help them through their current sorrow and also
prepare them for how to handle future events that provoke a similar sense of loss.

What many experts recommend is to harness the inevitable anguish, grief and sense of loss
in losing a loved one to doing something meaningful and worthy of the love you gave and
received from "Summer."

Possibilities are to create and maintain a special garden plot where your beloved is buried.
Or write stories, memories, or draw pictures of what you & they enjoyed sharing your love
with "Summer." Or make a photo album? etc.

Or dedicate time to your local humane society/dog/animal shelter?

Or any other similar activity or effort which will channel the energy in your sorrows to a
more beautiful &/or worthy tribute to the life you shared, well loved and missed?

HTH

 
#20 ·
I am so sorry and I feel your pain. It is so hard to lose our furbabies. Princess has been gone over a year and I still miss her. My sweet Gus is a big help and I love him so much but one never replaces another. I do not cry as much as I did and as hard as it is to believe it does get easier. The good memories are very very special.
(((hugs)))) to you and your family.
 
#21 ·
Thank You all again for your kind words, it's definitely gotten easier but she's talked about all the time and we always talk about our happy memories with her!
Bob thanks so much for your input. Everything you said was one of my top priorities especially with my older daughter, she was so upset and I let her grieve in her own way. She needed to bring pictures of her dog to school with her and carry them with her for a few days, she brought her collar and left it in her school bag. Her teachers were great and also helped her through it.
We did make a beautiful shutterfly photo album and we look at it often (i swear I took a million pictures of Summer so it was hard to narrow down almost 8 years of pictures!) I got a photo necklace made for my daughter b/c she wanted summer close to her heart forever so she loves to wear it and show everyone. We got a memorial stone to and can't wait til the spring to plant flowers for Summer. We are going to the beach this weekend which was Summer's favorite spot and her tennis ball was her favorite thing! SO we are going to write messages on her tennis ball and throw it into the ocean for her :)
We are grateful for the time we got with her and SOOOO grateful for all the memories. Like someone said They wouldn't trade that for anything.

We will be welcoming a new puppy into our home in about another month, a black lab this time and we will definitely make sure that the girls know that no dog will ever replace our Summer and to make another spot in your heart to love another doggie.
Thanks again everyone!
 
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