Film: "Blue Valentine" (2010)

[Bob Pr.]

"Blue Valentine" (2010) 112 minutes, "R" rated for explicit sex and some violence. Rated 7.9 of 10 on IMDb: Blue Valentine (2010) - IMDb Roger Ebert gives it 3.5 of 4 stars: Blue Valentine :: rogerebert.com :: Reviews "Rotten Tomatoes" says 88% of critics, 81% of audience approve. Michelle Williams has been nominated for an Oscar as best actress of 2010.

This is the story of the start and disintegration of a 6? year marriage between Cindy & Dean that probably should never have happened. Both partners come from dysfunctional families in which they never learned how parents would wisely choose partners with whom to have rewarding relationships.

Cindy's father had a terrible temper and was abusive to his passive wife and was distant, not very warm, with his daughter. When Dean was a pre-teen, his mother ran off with another man; he was raised by his father who then became involved with various women. Cindy was sexually active at 13 (looking for love?) and by age 21 she'd had at least 25 sexual partners. Dean dropped out of high school (lack of interest) and worked as a house painter &/or a laborer for a moving company. Cindy had goals of being a doctor but went to nursing school.

They accidentally meet when Dean helped move an elderly man into the nursing home where Cindy was visiting her grandmother. Their meeting leads to dating (and sex). Cindy enjoys Dean's footloose attitude but she becomes pregnant. She almost gets an abortion but changes her mind at the last minute and decides to marry Dean; they have a daughter, Frankie, whom they both love.

But gradually, their differences become more pronounced, as do their arguments which show no listening or understanding of the other. Cindy wants Dean to use his untapped talents to make more of himself; Dean is content with the status quo. Roger Ebert's review captures these differences very well when he wrote that, to Dean, his marriage with Cindy is the RR station while Cindy wants their marriage to be the train. She finally demands a divorce which he argues heatedly, futiley against.

There are slight hints about their futures: a doctor in the hospital where Cindy works seems interested in her (but for what reasons?). And as Dean leaves Cindy and Frankie, it's a 4th of July evening, fireworks are going off for Independence Day. How will Dean use his independence? --follow a path similar to the one his father took? Or a different one? Has either one grown from this experience? Can either Cindy or Dean achieve a fulfilling second marriage? What will Frankie's life script be like? We can only guess.

The film's story is told in a variety of intermixed cuts which show their lives at various life stages, e.g. -- when Cindy was a nursing student & spending her required day in a wheelchair to appreciate its restrictions, or 'servicing' a male nursing student boy friend in a linen closet--arguments that don't end or resolve--happy times before they married--how they first met--burying the family dog, etc., --etc.

I thought intermixing flashbacks of so many stages was sometimes confusing: their ages and appearances didn't differ that much over the few years. I hoped for a glimpse of ring fingers trying to tell is this a scene from before their marriage or at what stage in their marriage?

After some reflection, my rating now is 9 of 10, and that's 2 or 3 points higher than immediately after seeing it. "BV" doesn't give any answers, instead it generates lots of discussion and thinking for most people. I (sadly) found the portrayal of people and events to be absolutely, 100% psychologically realistic and true to life. I would have given it a 10/10 if not for my problems with keeping its flashbacks straight. Unique, destined to become an enduring classic.

BUT BEWARE: people who mainly like upbeat, happy ending films should save their money and avoid their nausea.

ETA: Videos, trailer, clips: Videos and Trailers: Blue Valentine (2010)